Thursday, June 18, 2009

Dysfunctional family

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
A dysfunctional family is a family in which conflict, misbehavior and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur continually and regularly, leading other members to accommodate such actions. Children sometimes grow up in such families with the understanding that such an arrangement is normal. Dysfunctional families are primarily a result of co-dependent adults, and also affected by the alcoholism, substance abuse, or other addictions of parents, parents' untreated mental illnesses/defects or personality disorders, or the parents emulating their own dysfunctional parents and dysfunctional family experiences.
Dysfunctional family members have common symptoms and behavior patterns as a result of their common experiences within the family structure. This tends to reinforce the dysfunctional behavior, either through enabling or perpetuation. The family unit can be affected by a variety of factors.
The table below shows the symptoms of family dysfunction according to three sources (two taken from the same expert). Symptoms that are roughly equivalent are shown in the same row:
Contents [hide]
1 Examples of a dysfunctional family
2 Effects on children
3 See also
4 References
[edit]Examples of a dysfunctional family

Denial (i.e. a refusal to acknowledge the alcoholism of a parent or child/teenager; ignoring complaints of sexual abuse)
Lack of empathy toward family members
Lack of clear boundaries (i.e. throwing away personal possessions that belong to others, inappropriate physical boundaries)
Mixed Messages
Extremes in conflict (either too much or too little fighting between family members)
Symptoms of family dysfunction Signs of unhealthy parenting Parenting styles which cause family dysfunction
Unpredictability "Dogmatic or chaotic parenting" (harsh and inflexible discipline)
Childlike (parents who "parentify" their children. They tend to be needy and incompetent. Usually allow the other parent to abuse children.) using physical means as consequences arbitrarily. Rule by fear. Conditional love
Depriving (parents who control by withholding love, money, praise, attention, or anything else their child needs or wants.)
Stifled speech (children not allowed to dissent or question authority) Cultlike (parents who feel uncertain and "raise their children according to rigid rules and roles".) "Denial of an Inner Life" (children are not allowed to develop their own value system)
Neuharth also includes these signs of unhealthy parenting:
Disrespect
Emotional intolerance (family members not allowed to express the "wrong" emotions)
Ridicule
Neuharth also includes these dysfunctional parenting styles:
Using (destructively narcissistic parents)
Abusing (parents who use physical, verbal, or sexual violence to dominate their children)
Perfectionist (parents who "fixate on order, prestige, power, and/or perfect appearances".)
[1]. [2] [3]
[edit]Effects on children

Children growing up in a dysfunctional family have been known to adopt one or more of six basic roles:[4]
"The Good Child" – a child who assumes the parental role.
"The Problem Child" – the child who is blamed for most problems, in spite of often being the only emotionally stable one in the family.
"The Caretaker" – the one who takes responsibility for the emotional well-being of the family.
"The Lost Child" – the inconspicuous, quiet one, whose needs are often ignored or hidden.
"The Mascot" – uses comedy to divert attention away from the increasingly dysfunctional family system.
"The Mastermind" – the opportunist who capitalizes on the other family members' faults in order to get whatever he/she wants.
They may also:
think only of themselves to make up the difference of their childhoods. They're still learning the balance of self-love
distrust others
have difficulty expressing emotions
have low self-esteem or have a poor self image
have difficulty forming healthy relationships with others
feel angry, anxious, depressed, isolated from others, or unlovable
perpetuate dysfunctional behaviors in their other relationships (especially their children)
lack the ability to be playful, or childlike, and may "grow up too fast"
often learn to live far away from their families.
[edit]See also

Alcoholism in family systems
Harry Stack Sullivan
Karpman Drama Triangle
Triangulation (family dynamics)
[edit]References

^ Farmer, S.: "Adult Children of Abusive Parents", pp. 19-34. Ballantine Books, 1989,
^ Neuharth, D.: "If You Had Controlling Parents: How to Make Peace With Your Past and Take Your Place In the World", pp. 4-5 Quill Books, 2002
^ Neuharth, D.: "If You Had Controlling Parents: Making Peace With Your Past and Taking Your Place In the World", pp. 14-15, Quill Books, 2002
^ http://www.nationmaster.com/encyclopedia/Dysfunctional-family

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